We’ve all been there. Even if you don’t have a blog…you’ve been there. The countless images on your phone, the constant editing, and the disappointment when the likes don’t roll in. The social pressure of creating the perfect life online is too real.
THE LOOK | gingham dress, sandals, hat, watch, celine sunglasses
We live in a world of constant pressure, social pressure more exactly, especially online. And that’s most likely not going to go away any time soon. It seems that everyone is in competition over the perfect life, and thanks to social media (specifically Instagram/IG Stories) it’s possible. Yes, it’s possible to create the perfect life on Instagram. But do people see right through it? Of course.
No one’s life is perfect. In fact, we’re all dealing with things that make our lives far from perfect. But there’s no way we’d wanna share those types of details with everyone. I mean, no one wants to be a Debbie Downer, right? I don’t know about you but I love seeing how people curate their perfect lives…a lot of people are really good at it. This doesn’t mean that the social pressure still isn’t there for a lot of us.
Let’s take a look at the photos from today’s post. Just a girl walking around Central Park with some hydrangeas, taking in the scenery in her favorite summer dress with no one around to bother her.
Want to know how this shoot really went down?
I was rushing uptown after work to meet Allie, and I didn’t have any time to pick up flowers…so she did it for me (she’s the bomb). Oh and it was also about three million degrees outside…on top of the fact I was already sweating from being on the subway and carrying three bags. It also just happened that Gapstow Bridge was DIRECTLY in the sun. And when I sat on the bridge, my butt was burning. Really bad. Basically, Allie and I were complaining the entire time, which we typically tend to do when it’s hot out (we HATE the heat). We had to pause about every five minutes so I could get myself together and make sure my hair didn’t look too wet with sweat. There were also a TON of people walking into our shots, trying to get their own perfect photo of The Plaza for their social media accounts.
Yet, here are the photos. And they seem to tell a different story, right? (They’re honestly a few of my favorite photos EVER.)
The social pressure of making sure you’re creating post-worthy content isn’t a new issue. It’s been around for quite some time now. And I’d be lying if I said I haven’t let the social pressure get to me. Here are some of the things I’ve personally faced:
Social Pressure = Be the best of the best
Of course there will always be competition between influencers. Sometimes it’s friendly, sometimes people take it to a whole new level of ugly. While I think competition is healthy to a certain extent, there may come a point when your life revolves around it. YOU want to be able to shoot at the best locations. YOU want to work harder than your competitors. YOU want to try out this new restaurant and post it before anyone else. YOU want to work with a specific brand before anyone else. And I have to admit, with these thoughts in my mind, it’s definitely lead me to create content that I’m really proud of. I have to constantly challenge myself to think outside the box, and force myself to use my creative side more often. I do need to make something clear though, I LOVE seeing my favorite girls succeeding: Bryn taking over LOFT’s Instagram Stories this weekend, Linda signing her first big collaboration with a major brand, Alicia & Laura Leigh taking their blogs full-time — it all makes me feel so honored to know these hard-working ladies!
Social Pressure = Feeling like a failure
But what happens when my “perfect” Instagram photo doesn’t do well? Does that mean my followers don’t appreciate my content? Are my followers even seeing my content (Ugh. Thanks to that stupid algorithm.)? Or if I’m out and about and forgot to create the cutest little Instagram story? Does that mean that I’m not doing my job as an influencer because I’m not sharing every detail of my life? These are some of the questions I ask myself a lot. I try not to get too caught up in it because I really try to live my life in the moment. I try to enjoy each and every opportunity given to me, and really try to unplug when I need it. When it comes to blogging, I definitely feel guilty if I don’t get a post up because I was too lazy to write it. I know that breaks are important, but I also know that people come here to read Pink Champagne Problems. That means I need to make sure I deliver. Sometimes, I feel “guilty” for spending my time offline. I know that’s silly and I know I shouldn’t feel that way, but I sure do sometimes. It also goes back to being the best of the best = social pressure issues. How am I supposed to hang with the big dogs if I can’t even get a post up?!
Social Pressure = The mental exhaustion
Social pressure definitely leads to a lot of people saying it’s not fun anymore. How sh*tty is that?! Look, I started my blog when blogging really wasn’t a “thing”. Over the years, I’ve had a ton of fun working on Pink Champagne Problems, and the thought of the fun aspect slowing down isn’t cool. I’m lucky enough that these thoughts don’t happen too often. But I truly get what people mean when they say it’s not fun anymore. But why isn’t it fun at one point or another? Well, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t roll my eyes when my alarm went off because I needed to get up early to create sale posts before everyone else did, or get so annoyed when I HAD to get an Instagram post up at 9:30PM even though I’m out with my friends. Blogging and social media have become so much more than just sharing snippets of your life or your outfits. They’ve become people’s businesses. Think about how some people have made an insane living by sharing their lives on social media. Crazy, right? For me, although Pink Champagne Problems isn’t my sole career, it’s definitely a big part of me. It’s my brand. And you know what? That gets exhausting. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE what I do here. But man, sharing your life online gets exhausting. I think that’s why I’ve begun writing more posts like this one today. I’m tired of sharing “Oh look at my perfect outfit, that you should totally shop and help me make some money,”…and leaving it at that. I want you to gain something by coming here. Of course, fashion will ALWAYS be my number one focus because it is what I love more than anything, but who says you can’t post a cute outfit while sharing you thoughts on social pressure? Because that’s what I just did;)
Social Pressure = The shame game
Social media platforms are double-edge swords. Over the last four and a half years, I’ve been part of an AMAZING community. And although it’s not always all cheery and nice, I’ve met some incredible people who are so inspiring. Those are the people who I can always count on for sweet words that brighten up my day and whose opinions matter SO much to me! Whether these people are readers or bloggers, I’m really grateful to have these platforms to connect with others! Then there’s the other end of the sword. When scrolling through your Instagram feed, you’re bound to see photos that make you feel pretty bad about yourself: The girl who has the “perfect body” (I wrote about body confidence in this post), the girl who is on the most amazing European vacation, the girl who has the expensive bag you’ve been coveting, or the girl who pushes out content like no other. We’ve ALL run into these types of girls before…and we’ve all may have had similar feelings. I really try to look past my jealousy and genuinely be happy for people. It helps when I reflect on my own life and realize that it’s a pretty damn good one! When I think about just how good I have it, these silly feelings tend to disappear.
Because social media is such a integral part of our every day lives (whether you’re a blogger or not), I don’t think the social pressure we deal with will ever go away. It’s how we DEAL with it in a healthy and positive way that matters. Don’t you agree? How do you find yourself dealing with the social pressure of living this Instagram-worthy life? Let me know in the comments below!
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This post is amazing – major high fives headed your way lady!!
Rebecca
xx
http://www.peppermintdolly.com
Thank you SO much Rebecca! High fives right back! xx
Such a great post Dana! You’re killing it online and offline! Keep doing what you’re doing girl.
xo elle
Thank you my friend! I appreciate the support! xx
Awesome post lady!! Appreciate your honesty and telling it like it is. The pressure is there for sure and it’s hard!!! It’s nice to see other bloggers understand it and also have those moments. On another note, you look amazing here and I am obsessed with this whole look.
xo Laura Leigh
http://www.louellareese.com
Thank you girlfriend! I love knowing we relate to each other and the support you always give me is so appreciated! xx
Awesome post, friend!! I totally feel you with the social pressure and it is honestly why I have taken a step back. I was focusing way too much on curating the perfect life for social media instead of living in the moment! I feel so guilty when I am asking a friend for an Instagram shot of my outfit, or if I skip out on time with family to write a blog post. It is definitely tough to balance, but I think you do such an amazing job! You are honest and real and that is one of the things I love about you. So thankful this crazy community brought us together. Keep doing what you’re doing, girlfriend!
xo, Lauren
http://www.itsallgoodblog.com
Thanks my girl! I can’t say that I don’t miss ya around these parts of the Internet, but I totally understand where you’re coming from! I have a lot of the same feelings. But I will always be so thankful that you’re in my life because of this crazy place! xx
THIS post!! First of all, the photos are stunning. Secondly, thank you for being so open and honest. I struggle with this pressure daily, and it’s one of the main reasons my motivation for blogging has lagged this year. How can I stand out? How can I find the time? etc., etc. Thanks for opening up and sharing that I’m (others are) not alone.
Miss and love ya lots! Xo
Kristyn
Ahhhhh, thank you my friend! It’s unreal, but I’m glad we can talk about it together — get ready for the Hamptons…ALL THE MOTIVATION!!! 😉 xx
I cannot get over how much bullshit pressure I feel about posting brand new content for Instagram! I honestly just shut down and tend to not post because I can’t afford new stuff constantly! I adore you for this post!
The Adored Life
Giiiiiirl you took the words right out of my mouth. Now I’m like, “fuck it, I’m not posting today” like three days straight! Thank you so much for your support, it always means so much to me! xx
YAS girl, all the yes. The pressure is REAL. And not just real…. can be debilitating. We all say it… don’t compare yourself. Comparison is a killer. But sometimes, especially when we’re feeling uninspired or burned out, seeing someone else excel in an area where we feel like we’re struggling can really prey on our weaknesses and make us feel awful. It’s so easy to forget that everyone is having their struggles and all is not as it seems, especially on social media or the internet! I’m so grateful for friends like you who keep it 100 and are so inspiring!! Love you and love this post! (And these photos are stunning!! And also… my life. Sweatball City in 100 degrees with frizzy hair and sweat dripping down my back trying to smile and look happy while not murdering my momtographer LOL)
I’m SO happy we can talk openly about this and I LOVE you for always being there for me when I text you (LOL). I’m so inspired by you as well and I hope you know that!!! — Also, I’d be lying if I said Allie and I don’t yell at each other when we’re shooting. And if my boyfriend is taking my photos, he DOES NOT hear the end of it 😉 xx
This is a great post, Dana! Obviously LOVE these photos (and even as a blogger, don’t think of everything happening behind the lens when I’m simply viewing them) and every point here is so, so true. xox!
Thank you so much, Monica! I appreciate your support! xx
This post is so on point! And I love this dress!
alexamjohnson.com
Thank you so much, Alexa! xx
I really loved reading this post, everything was so true and relatable. Also I loved your dress, its the perfect summer dress.
Lisa | Soho Stripes
Thank you, Lisa! I’m so happy you left a comment — I really appreciate your support! xx
This is a super interesting post and so helpful to beginner bloggers like me as it helps gain perspective. Thank you for sharing and keep doing the awesome work you’re doing!
White Silk, Black Leather
http://www.whitesilkblackleather.com
I’m so glad you found this post helpful, Masha! Thank you for your support and good luck with your blog!!! xx
Yes to all of this. It can be SO difficult, but just know your photos and content are awesome! Love following along!
Kenzie
SimplyJandK.com
Thank YOU so much, Kenzie! I truly appreciate this! xx
First of all – These photos are amazing and you look absolutely gorgeous (even if you complained the whole time)!
Second of all – This post…. so. much. yes. I’ve been trying to get all of my blogging down throughout the week so that on the weekends I can relax and “unplug” as much as possible! I am guilty of still being on Instagram and Twitter, posting and checking in, but I’ve made it a conscious habit not to stress over it.
I also think it’s SUPER important to realize you are your own person, so your life (& your social media posts) will be and should be different from everyone else’s!
Rachel / http://www.helloher.co
AHHH! Thank you so much, Rachel!
I’m so happy we could relate to each other — because you know a lot of people don’t! I love that you pointed out that we’re all different and are our own person — JUST DO YOU! xx
Dana, Love this post!! I really like your honesty and totally agree to everything you said! And I couldn’t help but relate to your shoot! I feel like this is how my shoot is 99% of the time! Blogger problems, right? Well anyways, I love what you do and keep doing you girl!
http://www.rdsobsessions.com
Thank you so much, Rach! I hope you know how much I LOVE your content and I think you are unbelievably inspiring! xx
I seriously adore you! I was nodding along with everything you said! I haven’t been blogging as long but can totally relate to everything! I love your blog because of your honesty. It’s so relatable which is the direction I think blogging is going. We all love fashion and cute outfits, but as you said it’s not always about an “instagram-worthy” life. Although, this look is definitely picture perfect! xo Bryn http://www.waketonroad.com
GIRL I ADORE YOU!
I say this every time, but I am so happy we’ve connected here. I think you are so genuine and truly deserve every single success that comes your way! xx
Love this post! So relatable!
I’ve told my husband several times that I’m so glad we grew up in the 90s, because the pressure young people must feel today is unreal. But I have to admit that I’m not immune to it myself, looking at all the beautiful images on Instagram can definitely make me feel inadequate.
x Silje
http://www.pentupstyle.blogspot.com
I saw this post last week (had to deal with a broken down car, so I totally forgot to drop a comment) but first off THANK YOU for always being someone who puts community over competition time after time! I was so stoked for that amazing Maggy London collab you did a few months back — I mean, the locations you chose were SO stunning, and the content looks so amazing!
We all know IG can be straight up exhausting, but please never feel guilty about taking time “offline” — we all need it! I actually always have one day a week where I don’t post or go on IG, email, or blogs (usually a Saturday). It’s good for the soul!